As a musician by heart I have tons of favorite song at every stage of my life. With too many to choose from it would be hard for me to write about a single song that I have favored during my senior high. However if talking about a theme song, a song that represented my love life in that particular stage of life I have one. Please pay attention because today I am revealing the story of my first love just for you.
The song is a local one sang by a legendary singer, the late Chrisye. The title is Untukku (For Me).
Translation:
Wherever I go, your shadow follows
I believe with all my heart, you are never replaceable
Take a look at the sparkling stars you are never hidden away
Wherever you are, there is my love
Even though you go to the end of the road I will be waiting
Even though you go to the seventh ocean I will definitely be waiting
Because I believe you are only for me
Only for me
Somehow this song was popular during the period where I was ‘seeing’ this special guy from my school. He was tall with fair complexion, strong build and friendly face.
It was raining when first time I was aware of him. We were all waiting for the rain at a small café across the street, near our school. He made a small talk with me, calling my name and that time all the way the conversation I couldn’t stop thinking “who is he? Why he knows my name?”. Later on I learnt he was my classmate. The school has just started. The class was shuffled and I hadn’t learnt about all my classmates yet.
From then on we began to become friend. He asked my number and we started calling each other every alternate days. And then soon after we started going together. To the mall, to the movies, sometimes with other friends sometimes just the two of us. He would pick me up after school. He took me to places like language course or basketball practice. The whole school thought we were a couple, but between us there had never been a statement or anything more than I missed you.
I fell in love with him but until now I had never got the clarity whether he had ever loved me at all.
Yes, I was too afraid to tell him about my feeling. I was scared he wouldn’t have the same feeling. In the end everything was just so overwhelming. He moved out of school to pursue his dream. After one year and a half the calls finally stopped. And I heard he was starting to be so closed with another girl.
When he forgot my birthday, I knew it was the end.
At this moment I had another theme song that best represented my feeling:
I still remember our last conversation. We were driving around in his car. He was asking me why I stopped talking with him unaware that he had forgotten my special day. I finally gathered myself to ask him where we stood. He said we were best friends and would always be best friends forever. The next week, I was on a train moving on with my heart joining a college miles away from the town.
And that is how my first love ended.
He was right after all. We were best friends indeed. And we still are.
Do you think he ever loved me?
PS: a bit late for an IBOT, oh but what a hell! This is also a prompt from Mama’s Kat 
Bebe says:
Haaaaah.. suaranya Chrisye itu ga tergantikan yaaaa.. Enaaaak banget
Hmmm… kira2 pernah suka ga yaa? susah juga siiih kalo cowok2 model gini. Ga jelaasss.. T_T
CuteCoco says:
Yeaap! Crunchy and soft..sukaaaaa banget!
Terry (My Journey With Candida) says:
Their are songs thoughout my life that has had special meaning for me, sometimes when I hear them,… I could be happy or sad, depending on the song.
Josefa @always Josefa says:
Love is a funny thing and love songs are the best way to try and define it
I am more than confident he loved you – of course he does!
Josefa from #teamIBOT
PS It is never too late for an IBOT post xx
EssentiallyJess says:
I have no idea the answer to that question! I was clueless with that kind of stuff, and I’m glad now that I am married and no longer have to worry about it!!
CuteCoco says:
You know jess, you are right..I am glad I am married now (and grown up lol). But sometimes when I think of it I think I should have just told him. It’s better to regret over something we’ve done rather than regret that we didn’t do anything
Robin (Masshole Mommy) says:
There are certain songs that bring me right back to a certain place or time in my life, too. It’s funny how we associate music with certain memories, but I love when a song comes on the radio and it reminds me of a person or a time that I may have forgotten about for a while.
CuteCoco says:
YES! It’s funny isn’t it? but it seems inevitable.
Theresa says:
I am not sure if it was love for him. I had a friend like that in high school I spent a lot of time with. We were best friends too, doing a lot of stuff together. He ended up dating my now current best friend and they ended up with 2 kids together. (however, they are no longer together). So, maybe it was a best thing only for him? Sometimes you can have a very strong connection with someone without having those romantic feelings thrown in too.
Rachel says:
That’s amazing that you are still best friends! He really knew what he was talking about! And it says a lot about you that you were able to adjust your expectations of the relationship and let your love for him go.
CuteCoco says:
Yeap. We invited each other on our wedding day too ha ha..and yes we still talk once in a while and he is on my contact list