Sipping up my cup of coffee with a bag of pom pom and two slices of pancake a la Colonel Sanders (the pancake is actually pretty good) I am recalling what had happened yesterday that had taken my entire nerve system and almost killed me literally. I realize that in some occasions, mostly unexpected, life can just turn his back and move to the other side of the road. When this kind of thing happens sometimes all we have to do is just sit quietly and suck it up.

So I finally fed up of Barney’s song. The boys have been singing that I love you – you love me song for almost 24/7 that I started to think every voice around me comes out with the same melody. But yesterday was the peak of my iceberg which finally blew. Not melted but blew, exploded into pieces.

It started when my three years old and I picked up his brother from school. K was fine and relaxed when we got him into the car. Just only two minutes away from the school the younger one started singing Barney’s. Little did I know that song would make my 30 minutes driving home was like a living hell. K started screaming and kicking asking his brother to stop singing. He wanted to sing that song but only by himself. But the more he screamed the louder his brother sang. In between my concentration to keep the car moving on it’s track I tried to tell K to stop screaming and to his brother, to stop singing. Well, it didn’t work. It was probably because of the sun, I don’t know. So K kept screaming..and screaming..all the way to our housing complex. I think the fact that our car window and my hearing are still intact now is actually a miracle.

Of course after the nightmare drive the last thing I wanted was to have another crying and whining at home. I was sleeping deprive and only got a few hours before driving back to school to take K to his after-class activities. All I wanted was a peaceful afternoon. But you know how it works. With two kids below four you just can’t expect a peaceful afternoon. No you can’t. You can’t expect any peace at all.

Raising my voice to the limit was my final resource when nothing worked. My mom was in the house and I thought with her presence I could finally have the support system I needed. Well, that support system shouted at me rudely from the kitchen that I was too loud and rough at my children and that the neighbor would hear me. All that was done in front of my kids. I felt like I was a seven years old who got scolded for breaking a jar.

Oh well, I guess that was just one of those days. You know, days when life suddenly changed direction and turned his back. Have you ever been in that kind of situation? Do you have a support system to help you cope up with the daily juggle?

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